I believe that most people are good.
That idea isn’t just a country song lyric — it’s a motto that’s shaped how I move through life.
My guiding principle? Assume positive intent.
This practice of positivity can influence your brain in powerful ways. It can also influence those around you — in ways you may never even see.
This simple mindset has changed how I lead, how I parent, how I partner, and how I show up at work.
Think about some daily friction points:
- An insistent nurse calls you repeatedly about what seems like a small issue.
- Your partner snaps at you while making weekend plans.
- A patient overreacts to a tweak in their care plan.
- A resident resists doing a needed procedure.
In each case, the easy move is to assume frustration, ill will, or incompetence. But what if you paused — and instead asked: “What’s going on underneath this?”
Because everyone has a backstory you may never see.
Let’s dig into the depth behind curiosity, the neuroscience of positivity, and how to apply this mindset — especially as women physician leaders working in complex, high-pressure environments.
The Depth Behind Your Curiosity
Assuming positive intent is really about having a deep curiosity about people. It’s a practice that rewires your brain for empathy, and creates connection instead of defensiveness.
Starting with positive assumption isn’t naïve — it’s curious. When you pause and assume goodness, you short-circuit your own stress response.
And the ripple effect? When people don’t feel judgment coming from you, they open up. They share more honestly, collaborate more constructively, and help you see their underlying intent clearly.
So let’s get curious about people, because you assume they are good and well-intended at baseline.
- That nurse may have lost a patient years ago with very similar symptoms.
- Your partner may have endured a brutal commute after a long shift.
- The patient might be overwhelmed with conflicting messaging from multiple teams.
- The resident might be silently carrying grief or burnout that nobody has asked about.
Curiosity quiets chaos — in others and in yourself. A ripple of positivity.
Shifting from Reactive to Curious
I haven’t always lived that way. Years ago, I had a falling out with someone close to me. It turned into years of silence and resentment. Back then, I couldn’t imagine there was any explanation for their behavior.
Now, I’d like to believe I’d pause long enough to ask: What might they be carrying?
That question — that moment of pause — has saved me from so many unnecessary conflicts since. It’s also the bridge between reactivity and curiosity.That mindset can prevent years of miscommunication, defuse conflict, and change how you see the world.
Assuming positive intent doesn’t mean ignoring harm or excusing bad behavior — but it gives you a starting posture: curiosity, empathy, and withholding judgment until you have more data.
And to be clear — it’s essential to maintain strong boundaries and a clear sense of your values, even as you practice this kind of openness.
Assume Positive Intent in Leadership
In leadership, assuming positive intent isn’t soft. It’s strategic.
It builds psychological safety, trust, and open communication — the hallmarks of great culture.[1]
Studies show that when leaders model curiosity and compassion rather than blame and judgment, team burnout rates drop, and satisfaction rises. [2],[3]
Leaders who can model this withholding of judgment and ask questions rather than assign intent help create safer, more collaborative environments.
This came to life for me recently when I met with a former resident.
She’s now years into a successful career. When we talked, she shared that she’d struggled in residency because of undiagnosed ADHD.
She told me I was one of the few attendings who paused long enough for her to express herself in our fast-paced environment.
She was brilliant, hardworking, and deeply committed — but the environment was working against her.
She had every ounce of good intent, but what she needed most was patience and understanding.
Those small moments of grace can shape an entire career.
That’s what leadership with positive intent looks like in action.
Just a small pause can make the difference between alienating someone and empowering them.
Challenges as a Women Physician Leader
Now, let’s be honest — our working environments are more stressful than ever:
- High patient volumes
- Financial and time pressures
- Moral distress and liability fears
- And, for women leaders, the invisible work — mentoring, bridge-building, relational repair.
So yes, seeing positive intent first can feel like one more demand, one more challenge.
But I’ve found that this mindset actually makes things easier. It gives me more information about others — and a mindset that diffuses frustration before it consumes me.
Still, it’s just one tool in the resilience toolbox that we all need to build for longevity in this rewarding — and sometimes punishing — field.
This practice doesn’t fix systems — but it protects your energy within them.
When faced with a tough situation, try saying, ‘I’m going to assume you meant well — help me understand.’
Or simply ask yourself, ‘What might they be carrying?
Balance in All Things – Including Positive Leadership
Now, for those of us lifelong people-pleasers — beware. If you always interpret everything positively, you risk inadvertently ignoring real problems or bottling your feelings. You still need to face real mal-intent.
Assuming positive intent doesn’t mean tolerating mistreatment. It means leading from steadiness — grounded in your values, but open to humanity.
Because yes — there will always be people who act in bad faith or incompetently.
You’ll recognize them when they appear.
Assuming positive intent doesn’t mean overlooking reality — it means approaching reality with steadiness and integrity.
For me, this mindset has sometimes led people to “pin” me as a friendly pediatrician — which I am — but as I grew into leadership, I realized that…
Empathy is not soft — it’s strength under control.
Empathy, balanced with clear boundaries, is what makes leadership sustainable — especially for women leading in medicine.
Closing Reflection
So this week, try the pause.
When frustration rises, ask: What might they be carrying?
Or simply say to yourself: Most people are good.
That small shift might just change your day — and someone else’s.
This is Dr. Stephanie Yamout, and this is Women MD Leaders. If you are enjoying this show, please take a moment to share it with someone you know.
Until next time — Get your time back. Own your value. Command the room. And Take Care.
[1] https://emergenetics.com/blog/the-power-of-positive-intent/?utm
[2] Spilg EG, McNeill K, Dodd-Moher M, Dobransky JS, Sabri E, Maniate JM, Gartke KA. Physician Leadership and Its Effect on Physician Burnout and Satisfaction During the COVID-19 Pandemic. J Healthc Leadersh. 2025 Feb 27;17:49-61. doi: 10.2147/JHL.S487849. PMID: 40034467; PMCID: PMC11874771.
[3] Mete M, Goldman C, Shanafelt T, et al. Impact of leadership behaviour on physician well-being, burnout, professional fulfilment and intent to leave: a multicentre cross-sectional survey study. BMJ Open 2022;12:e057554. doi: 10.1136/bmjopen-2021-057554